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fart stories

thewholecake

Well-Known Member
ok cake start.

cake was driving along in the car like normal, but he had been having a sore belly for most of the morning. cake was feeling somewhat stuffy and sore in the car when all of a sudden he felt an opportunity, signalled by that distinct gergling sound coming from his belly.

now cake enjoy all sorts of personal challenges. cake thought to himself 'wonder if it possible to drown out the radio'. so naturally, like all men who are excited about an on-coming bum-baby, cake wound up the windows..

like an old lady who's driven into a lamp post, it sounded like a horn which kept going at a constant pitch for what seemed like 20 minutes.

have u ever had that experience when your love-puff reaches your nose before its completely finished? kind of like a bum-nose feedback. anyway, what entered cakes nose was so awful it could clear out a church. of course, cake paniced. with an abrupt squeak, cake hit the abort muscle. it sounded like a young child asking a question.

cake knew that winding down the window wasn't enough. he needed some serious air and quick. in what seemed like a blurr, cake hit the breaks, and in a single motion, turned the wheel and hit the hazard lights in one go.

cake pulled over & burst out the drivers door, coughing and bending over. almost immediately, in a moment of humanitarian compassion, an old lady stopped her car & got out, thinking cake was having a heart attack. cake never ever seen an old lady go from nice and caring to disgusted so quickly. she hopped in her car and drove away.

in these modern times, it nice to know that strangers are willing to help.

so cake willing to return the favour and offer support for those in need. share ur fart stories. :)
 

cccdfern

Administrator
Staff member
I would have laughed louder had it not been for the quietness required of this hour :p
 

Sunncaeks

Well-Known Member
I always fart in the bed. I then proceed to pull my "sexy face". The face the girlfriend finds most irresistable. You can all try this too.

For extra points; drink loads of dark beers and eat dynamite hot chilli the night before and proceed to lift the blankets overheads.
 
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