Now that I have your attention, I suppose I should let you know a little about me. Oh, and here’s your porn. –> ( . Y . )

I go by a variety of aliases, mainly because it’s harder to link all my crimes under different names, so you can call me AlphaClank, *Alpha*, *Trojan Fox* or Trojan. I have some more, but they’re unrelated to TF2. Also, that’s Trojan as in the wooden horse that appeared to be friendly, but turned out to be full of bloodlust, not the condom. I’m currently in my second year of my double degree in Corporate Systems Management/Games and Interactive Entertainment. That’s right. Games. As a job. My job is better than yours. For this reason, BR’s asked me to keep you guys up to date on gaming stuff, because apparently you don’t have access to game news sites. I joined the forum because I know BR IRL, and he’s a *REALLY COOL GUY*.

My consoles so far have been (in order): Sega Mega Drive, PS1, PS2, PSP, PS3, Decent PC, so as you can imagine, I’m fairly new to PC gaming and have a greater knowledge in PlayStation games. The Admiral’s drunken ramblings last Halloween were responsible for fully converting me to a PS3/PC gamer, with his recommendation of TF2, which he claimed was a fun FPS. Little did I know that TF2 was actually a MMO in disguise, and MMO’s do bad things to me. And your mother. So after playing for fun for about a week, I discovered trade servers, and hence entered a 2 month trade frenzy in order to collect every weapon and poly hat (excluding reskins). Now after completing that task (and collecting and modifying 2 hats to make them Professor Layton like), I have a vast knowledge on the worth of items and the ability to manipulate people who trade with me (although I don’t rip off friends). As of today, I currently have 356/368 achievements (guess what else my OCD decided I needed to collect) and I am currently looking to attain items (4 backpack expanders and shitloads of tokens) to sort my backpack compulsively. You can see my current backpack here: http://www.tf2items.com/id/alphaclank . My favourite 3 classes are Scout, Sniper and Soldier (subject to change), with Demoman, Heavy and Spy being my least favourites. Ignore all my stats, they’re fucked up from achievement servers. When I’m not playing Hat Fortress 2, I’ll tend to play games with charm (especially good puzzle games and RPG’s), like LittleBigPlanet, Wind Waker, Ratchet & Clank and Breath of Fire III (my favourite game ever) while avoiding most generic FPS’s like COD, Halo and generally anything made/funded by Activision.

That pretty much sums up everything I can think of that you need to know. If you have any questions, post them below and I’ll be happy to ignore them. Also, treat me like you’d want to be treated if you were a god.

?Trojan Fox?

EDIT: Goddammit BR, stop editing my posts.