Oh great Doem, answer me this.

I received the following email. What should I spend all my monies on?

THE SHELL PETROLEUM CORPORATION.
Address: Shell U.K. Limited Shell Centre, London SE1 7NA.

Congratulations To You!

YOU HAVE WON TWO MILLION FIVE HUNDRED THOUSAND BRITISH POUNDS (£2,500,000.00) ON SHELL PETROLEUM UK/QATAR DRAW. REF NO.: CD80.

INCLUDE YOUR FULL NAME AND TELEPHONE NUMBER FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE OF YOUR WINNERS CERTIFICATE TO YOU.

CONGRATULATIONS!

YOUR IN SERVICE,

MR. BRIAN WILLIAMS.
COORDINATOR FOR DRAW WINNERS.
THE SHELL PETROLEUM CORPORATION, UK.

Hire this guy!!!

o dome of knowledge i ask thee
when the f*** will Australia have some decent batsmen again…
explain with depth and reason

o and Das Boot was a good choice
WHATS NEXT?

k go

Oh great Doem, answer me this.

I received the following email. What should I spend all my monies on?

Unfortunately cows, it appears as though your personal contact details have been compromised. As difficult as this may be to believe, the correspondence you have received is not legitimate.

Of course, most concerning of all in this is not in fact the fraudulent unsolicited communications, but that your email address has fallen into the wrong hands! In situations like this I often recommend a review of all persons with access to your personal affairs. Have you recently changed your domestic arrangements / had a non technically literate person move in with you? If so, could this person be accessing questionable online resources?

As a firm but decisive measure I suggest you install [url]this program[/url] to monitor all online interactions on your PC. You may find out more than you bargained for.

o dome of knowledge i ask thee
when the f*** will Australia have some decent batsmen again…
explain with depth and reason

o and Das Boot was a good choice
WHATS NEXT?

k go

Ah Doug my learned friend, a double-pronged question. Excellent.

On the matter of the australian batting of late I can only suggest that for future tests we look to invert the batting order. Time and time again the lower order have proven themselves far more capable than their higher placed brethren. Nathan Lyon is more than capable opening the batting and Peter Siddle would appear to be an ideal first drop. Michael Clarke appears to be more comfortable the further he recedes down the order, so I suggest placing him somewhere around 9-10. As an added benefit, his back should respond to his demotion down the order and he should be able to churn out a few more overs with the ball given he is about the best option we have as a spinner these days.

As to your celluloid extra curricular activities, may I suggest that your next feature film be Machete? This is a time honored classic tale of intrigue and revenge which cannot be missed. Given the second installment for this franchise is due out in cinemas soon, I suggest you catch this as soon as possible. You won’t be sorry you did!

Dear Doam kent,

Clive Palmer Vs Barnaby Joyce……. who would win the most derps in question time?

Also, Turnbull Vs Hockonomics………. which kent has oozed the most fat?

k FAP!

y sumtimes when i tickle my percy, if i have finger in my bottom my sperm shoots further?????????

Clean forum is meant to be cleanish. keep it that way please. AS IN “don’t ruin it for yourselves”.

Clean forum is meant to be cleanish. keep it that way please. AS IN “don’t ruin it for yourselves”.

^^^^ = dead forum.

relax lol

Dear Doam kent,

Clive Palmer Vs Barnaby Joyce……. who would win the most derps in question time?

Also, Turnbull Vs Hockonomics………. which kent has oozed the most fat?

k FAP!

Ah yes australian politics, you’ve always been a keen observer.

Firstly, Barnaby Joyce is a known quantity, there is little that he can do to raise eyebrows these days. Palmer on the other hand has the potential for significant amusement and folly if he actually takes up his office. He should ensure a steady supply of comedic fodder for the chaser boys and ensure they keep their jobs at the abc.

Turnbull has undoubtedly been the more spectacular of the 2 heavy hitters in the coalition since the election. Hi steadfast / contemptuous refusal to pay any heed to the NBN petition has been both entertaining and unsurprising. Expect the coalition to exercise the “we have a mandate” excuse for whatever hairbrained policies they dream up in the short to medium term at least.

^^^^ = dead forum.

relax lol

Unfortunately you seem to have missed the point of this thread joker, which was to pose head-scratching conundrums for me to solve.

Since this was lost on you, I shall ask a question for you: HOW WORRIED IS DEAN BARKER AT THIS POINT?

Answer: Must be beside himself.
Prediction: If Oracle do actually get home in the final race, expect many comparisons to Jana Novotona etc and plenty of news reports posing the question if it is the biggest “choke” in history

(For the record, I wouldn’t mind seeing Oracle get so close and then get pipped at the post by TNZ)

OH SHINY ONE~!

How long will the Libs last at the current rate?

also what’s the weather like over there?

@ jerker .

Unfortunately you seem to have missed the point of this thread joker, which was to pose head-scratching conundrums for me to solve.

Since this was lost on you, I shall ask a question for you: HOW WORRIED IS DEAN BARKER AT THIS POINT?

Answer: Must be beside himself.
Prediction: If Oracle do actually get home in the final race, expect many comparisons to Jana Novotona etc and plenty of news reports posing the question if it is the biggest “choke” in history

(For the record, I wouldn’t mind seeing Oracle get so close and then get pipped at the post by TNZ)

I HOPE WE LOSE. BECAUSE OUR COUNTRY DON’T HAVE A WINNING MENTALITY. IN COUNTRIES LIKE THE USA AND AUSTRALIA WINNING IS THE BOTTOM LINE. HERE IN SHEEP LAND, KIDS GETS MEDALS AND A PAT ON THE BACK JUST FOR PARTICIPATION. IT’S TIME WE LEARNT TO BE RUTHLESS, SOULESS, ICEVEINED MACHINES DEVOID OF EMPATHY WHEN IT COMES TO SPORTS.

HAVE 6 MATCH POINTS TO WIN THE AMERICAS CUP, AND THEN LOSE? YUP, GUESS WHO?? NONE OTHER THAN GUTLESS, FGTLIKE, SPINELESS KIWI LOOOOOOOOOOOSERS. DO YOU KNOW AT MY WORK MORONS HAVE BEEN STANDING IN FRONT OF THE BIG SCREEN TV IN THE FOYER JUST TO WATCH US LOSE RACES ALL WEEK? HAHAHAHAH IDOTS

JUST LIKE US FAILING IN RUGBY WORLD CUPS. SO SICK OF DOMINATING THE FOUR YEARS IN BETWEEN, AND THEN DECIDING TO GO LIMP AND LOSE OUR MANHOOD WHEN IT COUNTS. THE RUGBY WORLD CUP IN 1987 DIDN’T EVEN COUNT FFS, WERE SOUTH AFRICA THERE!?!??!?! N O P E. HERE’S A GOOD IDEA, LETS PLAY CHRISTIAN CULLEN AT CENTRE JUST A FEW MONTHS BEFORE THE WORLD CUP STARTS, WELL DONE JOHN HART YOU STUPID NOB. AND WELL DONE ROBBIE DEANS FOR DROPING CULLEN FOR THE 2003 WORLD CUP, THAT WORKED OUT WELL DIDN’T IT, GREAT IDEA PLAYING LEON MCDONALD AT CENTRE TOO. /FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF

HEY! WE DREW THREE GAMES AT THE SOCCER WORLD CUP!!!!!! LETS CELEBRATE MEDIOCRITY LIKE A BUNCH OF FGTS!! WELL DONE ALL WHITES, WE WILL HONOUR YOU WITH PARADES AND SING SONGS ABOUT YOU NOT LOSING FOR ONCE!! GOOD JOB BOYS! YEEEEAAAAAH!

SCREW DEAN BARKER, AND HIS GOLD DIGGING WIFE. SCREW THE LAME SPORT THAT IS SAILING, AND SCREW ALL OF YOU TOOOOOOOOO. OH, AND ALSO SCREW RUSSELL COUTTS FOR PLAYING FOR THE ENEMY. BRING BACK PETER BLAKE. THAT DUDE WOULD RUN OVER HIS FAMILY WITH HIS DERPING BOAT JUST TO WIN A DERPING RACE.

WPEIFGWY HOIUNFUSHF GVSFHASVKGJDKFUDFUGFLKJGHGNAS DHGOAS DGLDSJKAGLJS BGSBDGSDKHB GKSABDK GABISU FA!%$@!$^$@#%q^$^#q$^)&)#q*&$%@&$Z8-024

OH SHINY ONE~!

How long will the Libs last at the current rate?

also what’s the weather like over there?

@ jerker .

Not too good fern, it’s been raining all week. Water is leaking into our house. Time to pray to the rain god.

Dear doam of chrome,

Now that the head of operation sovereign borders is on 2 weeks leave, how will the navy manage to turn back the boats?

On a supplementary question, will we be hiring the nz americas cup team to patrol our borders?

Finally, Hockonomics has blasted ALP for getting all their figures wrong. Should we all start a new mathematics curriculum where

$1+$1= -$300billion?