Just some “tips” (if you will) on being annoying on the internet/forums. There were more, but I felt that people would be TL;DR’ing if I added all of them. Which one(s) do you fit in?

1. Make up fake acronyms. Online veterans like to use abbreviations like IMHO (in my humble opinion) or RTFM (read the [snipping] manual) to show that they’re “hep” to the lingo. Make up your own that don’t stand for anything (SETO, BARL, CP30, /FF), use them liberally, and then refuse to explain what they stand for (“You don’t know that? RTFM”).

2. WRITE YOUR MESSAGES IN ALL CAPS AND DON’T USE RETURNS SO THAT EVERYONE HAS TO SCROLL ACROSS THEIR SCREENS TO READ EVERY LINE. ALSO USE A LOT OF !!!!! TO SHOW THAT YOU’RE EXCITED ABOUT BEING HERE!

3. When replying to your mail, correct everyone’s grammar and spelling and point out their typos, but don’t otherwise respond to the content of their messages. when they respond testily to your “creative criticism,” do it again. Continue until they go away.

4. Join a discussion group and tie whatever’s being discussed back to an unrelated central theme. For instance, if you’re in a discussion of gun control, respond to every message with the observation that those genetically superior tomatoes seem to have played an important role. Within days, all discussion of gun control will have ceased as people write you threatening messages and instruct others to ignore you.

5. Be the “What’s google?” poster. If you have a question you better make for damn sure that you spent at least 10 minutes trying to find the answer elsewhere on the net before you ask it in a forum. The post is usually called “Quick question.” And is of the following nature, “Hey, does anybody know the name of that really tall building in Malaysia? Thanks!” The amount of time it takes to find the answer to that question is about 20 seconds. Why don’t you put the effort in before you expect others to help you? The “What’s google?” poster is almost always followed up by the “That’s google!” poster. The self elected person who has to say something like, “Did you even try googling?” or just “Google”. Occasionally they get really sarcastic and write something like, “Hey, there’s this great website called google…”

6. Have a freaking book as your signature person. Ughhhhhh people. Ughhhhhhhh. Stop doing this. That little space at the bottom of each post is reserved for one line. One line. That’s why they call it a signature. They don’t call it, “your personal webpage on this forum”. Just have your one quote there, as long as it’s not your own. I can’t for the life of me understand how people can quote themselves -Me.
Seriously, you do realize that we see this every time you post a comment right? It’s not a one time thing. Three quotes, a poem, and a picture of your kids is too much ok. I won’t even touch the subject of those meter things that take forever to load on slow connections that are all the rage…

7. Use so many smileys and emoticons as much as you can in every post that you make.

8. Respond to a topic when you’ve only read the last page of it.

9. The constant 10 year old. There is always that one person who has to always point out the most obvious things in the world. Always. They are also the person who has a Disney princess or Sesame Street character as their avatar. Usually they have like 6000 posts. Typical comments are, “You shouldn’t smoke!”, “I love Christmas”, “My boyfriend is great!”, “Winter is cold.”, and a variety of well known trivia facts like, “In England they call a cigarette a fag!”, “The capitol of Australia is actually Canberra not Sydney!”, and “Mark Twain’s real name was Samuel Clemens.”
This person is similar to the constant 16 year old who acts like they know everything, have done everything, and yet still find it amusing to bring up really mundane and juvenile sex related topics like, “If you could do it anywhere….”

10. Make something out of everything. Even if it doesn’t involve you.

11. And finally, the “witty sonuvabitch”. You know the one. The one that has to put on a show every time they post anything. The one that thinks it’s hilarious to quote Monty Python if it is at all remotely related to the thread subject. The one that puts up those hilarious photos that are all over the place. The one that has the “humorous” avatar, although quite often it’s an animated .gif. They are also the ones with a profound signature that they change seemingly every other day. This guy is the opposite of the “gloomy” person.”
The gloomy person only posts when they have a chance to explain how uninterested they are in what’s going on. They start something and then don’t post anything else. Quite often they’ll post things like, “Explain to me why I should read your posts?” and “Yaaaaaawwwn.” They offer nothing positive, unless it is in their particular area of expertise. These people suck the life blood and energy out of threads and forums. You really have to wonder what on earth these people are thinking. Do they actually get some joy out of that?